Humbled by the Truth

Self effort really gets me nowhere except eventually, hopefully, to the end of myself. I can do nothing alone but thru Christ I can do all things. Yet, still I struggle wanting so badly to fix things yet knowing thru experience that I not only don't accomplish what I hope to but often create more of a mess. So it is back to my knees I go.
I am starting to see that my dreams have me at the center where my hope has Christ at the center. I can trust God, I can't trust myself; I have let myself down too many times. God has never let me down. There were times I was deceived to think perhaps He had, but by the end of the chapter I learned I was very wrong.
To believe the lie that I can somehow satisfy my own needs often leads to another lie - that I can somehow control someone else. Its like that tiny snowball that starts at the top of the hill and by the time it has rolled to the bottom, it has become huge. Big enough to roll right over me and bury me underneath. It is easy enough to stop the snowball - by accepting my responsibility to control myself (the only one I can), and trust God with my needs. Its funny how that works. Once I become willing to relinquish my needs to Him, I end up thanking Him as I realize He has always met my needs once I get out of the way. I know I can trust Him. He knows, better than I do, what I need at the time. He truly is my Father who created me and knows me so intimately that He knit me together in my mother's womb. No wonder all I need to do is thank Him.